


a million things you haven't done

by NerdsLikeUs



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Melinda May Bus Mum, Mentions of Fitzsimmons - Freeform, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-20 16:04:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9499412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NerdsLikeUs/pseuds/NerdsLikeUs
Summary: While trying to free her from Radcliffe's simulation, Coulson reminds May why it is worth coming home.





	

He can’t ever remember feeling desperation like this. “Fitz, get her out of there!”  
“I can’t!” yells Fitz. “I can’t, if I pull her out now, with no warning, it could hurt her, permanently damage her brain!”  
Coulson grips May’s arm, touches the blood on her cheek and knows what he has to do.  
“Put me in,” he says. Fitz stares at him, disconnected.  
“Sir, I – ”  
“Put me in, Fitz, and I can tell her what’s happening, I can convince her to come back.”  
The desperation in his voice is reflected in Fitz’s eyes. After barely a beat, Fitz nods and turns back to his tablet.   
“Okay.”  
Before Coulson quite knows how, he is sitting on the floor next to May, a weird helmet on his head, wires taped all over him.  
“You only have a few minutes,” says Fitz. “Then the program will get rid of you.”  
Coulson swallows, and takes his partner’s hand.  
“I’m coming for you May,” he says, and dives.

He opens his eyes to a shudderingly familiar scene. There are sirens and flashing lights and grateful men, and May sitting in an ambulance.   
It is like a bullet piercing his gut, the moment of recognition. She is living in her nightmares; he wants so desperately to hold her and pull her free.  
Except here, something is different to his memories. He approaches her, and she is bloody and bruised, but not broken. Smiling.  
“Coulson,” she greets him as she hangs up the phone, and he sees the girl asleep behind her.  
She is world-worn and weary, but still so light. Coulson’s heart twists at the thought of being the one to take her away from that brightness, and he wonders for a moment if it would really be so bad to let her stay.  
But he cannot leave her.  
“May,” he says, low and urgent. “You aren’t going to believe what I’m about to tell you, but please, just listen.  
“None of this is real. Radcliffe put you in this artificial simulation and replaced you with an android. I'm here to take you back home.”  
May’s brow scrunches a little as though she thinks he’s telling a joke. “Phil ...”  
“I know it sounds crazy, but –”  
She shakes her head as though trying to clear his words from her mind. “I talked to Andrew. The girl is safe. Everything’s going to be okay.”  
She wants this to happen, wants this scenario to play out. She wants it to be real.  
He grips her shoulders (they feel so solid, everything seems true) and tries to reach her. “Don’t you remember?” he asks her. “The girl was the inhuman. You did what you had to do, but you couldn’t save her.”  
She pushes his hands away and stands, defying his words. “No.”  
“May ...”  
“No,” she says. “No, you're wrong. The girl is safe. The girl is safe.” She repeats it to herself, over and over, keeping her eyes fixed on the child asleep in the ambulance.  
“Please, May ...” Coulson can feel his voice getting hoarser, can feel precious time slipping by in the real world. “We need you. I need you.”  
His words seem to touch something in her. She’s still shaking, but at least looking at him now, confused but with a flicker of something else in her eyes.  
He takes a step towards her, hands reaching out. “You lose the girl May. But you have to move on. Keep going. There’s so much more that you need to do.  
“You need to drive our Bus.”  
 _Flying. Shaving cream. A bright red car. Children with smiles full of optimism, their laughter seeping into her heart._  
“And then there’s Hydra, and Ward ...”  
 _Friends in handcuffs. Writing on a fake window. Rage and defeat mixed inside her, filling her lungs._  
“Remember when you kicked his ass?”  
 _Sparks and punches and sweat. A fractured larynx not nearly being enough._  
“We need you to fight Hive. Andrew needs you there.”  
 _Another broken heart, another lost girl. She fights, and her girl comes home, but Andrew is gone again at the end._  
“Remember our kids, May. You need to find them.”  
 _Science twins, finishing each others’ sentences and falling in love. Gadgets and goggles and sandwiches and sunrise. They are her softness, their strong bones her legacy._  
 _A lost girl, strength mirroring her own. A bright pink dress giving way to blackened armour, a smile changing to scars. She is laughter, she is steel, she is her source of hope._  
 _The mechanic wielding a shotgun-axe, the girl as fast as thought, the bickering clown and warrior, the man that turned to dust. Their kids on the base, their kids on the Bus, giving her a place and a purpose and a reason to smile._  
“I know you want to stay here. But please, Melinda, remember what you're coming back to. Remember why it’s worth coming home.”  
There are tears tracking down her dust coated cheeks now. She touches fingers to his jaw, and it feels so real. He takes her hand.  
 _Coulson. Steady and clever and stupid and wonderful, keeping her grounded, keeping her flying. Keeping her safe._  
May nods and he knows she remembers, knows she is ready. Coulson grips both her hands in his, and she smiles her saddest, happiest smile.  
“Everything’s going to be okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed it - as always, comments and feedback are really, really appreciated :)


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